Destination Consciousness
a most uncomfortable journey

With signage like this quote, it’s hard to know whether to take the detour to consciousness or stay on the unconscious superhighway with everyone else. What’s worse? The sameness and smallness of you and your life – that which you call fate? Or the deeply uncomfortable journey toward consciousness? You have my deepest sympathies as you ponder this.

I felt trapped in that long-haul semi-truck of sameness for most of my life. In many ways I knew I was living an inauthentic life but, beyond Marge, I didn’t have much support in changing it. Whatever changing it even meant I hadn’t a clue. Eventually, life and consciousness facilitated me toward reaching for more. Being the same old same old was just too uncomfortable. But, it was never, not ever, easy. Every turn was always painful, difficult, flabbergasting, frustrating, devastating, traumatizing, and eventually generative and expansive.

Somewhere, just after college, and long before I knew anything about anything, I chose to take the path less traveled. I took the exit that read: Consciousness. Sadly no one warned me about all the back allies, dead ends, unpaved roads lined with tacks, roundabouts to nowhere, jug handles, and super highways paved with slippery glop that I’d need to traverse.

And that’s the rubber on the road. The journey toward consciousness isn’t cute. You have to condition yourself to the discomfort of full awareness, knowing, being, and receiving. You, along the way, reconcile that consciousness includes absolutely everything and judges nothing. It’s the whole enchilada like it or not.

And now that I’ve reached the destination, I’m also wise enough to know it’s no destination at all. It’s a constantly shape-shifting twelve-dimensional road map made in dream space. There is no one road, there is a bazillion of them and they’re entirely ephemeral. And yet, here I am, I’ve arrived, in a still moving vehicle – my body – and discovered this expansive and generative state of consciousness will only continue to exist if I remain totally awake at the wheel of it. No pit stops, no snacks, no peeing. That means totally awake to my own bullshit, and that of others, and totally awake to the abundance and gratitude I have for what I’ve created for myself. My new life. What’s required is to never fall asleep (again) at the wheel. I got here by:

my willingness to ask questions that opened me up
my willingness to be deeply uncomfortable for what felt like an eternity
my willingness to invest lots of money, time, and effort into my own self-discovery and healing
my willingness to lose absolutely everything and everyone, in favor of me, my truth, and my wellbeing

This journey has prepared me for exactly what I’ve always wanted to do since I made that request just out of college. I now facilitate consciousness. It can be a hard sell, who wants a ride on a glop-ridden road? Not many. But for those that choose it – choose themselves – there is no greater reward than arriving at all of you. The ease of having all of you, at the wheel of your own life – in your potency – and true power is a gift that no one can take that from you.